Friday, April 20, 2007

Monty Python - The Galaxy Song

The Way I See It # Two-Million One

So maybe I should have taken just one quick minute to add an itty-bitty note to my last "post", clarifying that the picture contained therein wasn't meant as a commentary on my new job - good, bad or otherwise. Work is ok... lower case "oh" lower case "kay". Sometimes even upper case "Oh". Maybe I'm in a little rut; but the good kind, when you know you're not at risk of getting thrown out the door on you're ass (if that doesn't sound like that a ringing endorsement, Congratulations! You've never spent all 40 hours of your work-week wondering when you're going to get thrown out on your ass.)

Indicative of said rut, however, is the fact that I'm back to visiting Starbucks on a regular basis, when I'm not making the stuff at home.

I know, I know. And trust me, it does make me feel all dirty inside. Lately, though, it's worse than just the crypster guilt of not supporting the local guy. It's those idiotic "The Way I See It" anecdotes printed on the side of Starbucks cups.

Yes, I know I've complained about this before; I realize that I should just ignore those obnoxious transmissions from "Clever-Clever Land", use my own, environmentally-friendly cup, or maybe just get some 7-11 "Energy Coffee" if I'm in such a damn hurry. But it's like driving by the proverbial car accident, or looking in Pandora's Box, or reading The Family Circus on your way to the horoscopes - your free will becomes the illusion that so many philosophers have claimed it is; you're powerless to turn away, no matter the consequences. (DAMN YOU, BIL KEANE!!!)

The other day my "Shot-in-the-Dark" came w/ an extra shot of ass-clown, raving about how "Darwinism" is responsible for all the world's perceived ills. As is to be expected, not implied among those ills were war, famine, gluttony, greed, deceit, coveting your neighbors wife,




coveting your neighbor's horse, Sloth, jealousy, any disease that could possibly be construed as The Almighty's punishment for something or other; getting my chocolate in your peanut butter, or getting your peanut butter in my chocolate.

But really, what are you gonna do? "Reason" with him? Waste your time trying to explain to this guy that there's no such thing as a "Darwinian Fundamentalist"; zealots who take ol' Chuck's work as (ahem) gospel, just because he wrote it a century and a half ago? Baby, there ain't a cup venti enough in the world for you to try.

So, as if to illustrate this isn't just some quirk, today my cup featured the musings of that wise and all knowing sage Dr. Laura, ruminating on nothing less than the "Meaning of Life". What the Hell? I wouldn't even trust Dr. Laura's opinion on the movie "The Meaning of Life".

Whatever. Mine has never been any sort of "issues" blog (see pic of Sloth chillin' w/ Chunk, above) People can believe whatever claptrap they want. I just don't know that I want to drink from a cup that spews this kind of ignorance.

It's like in that movie "What the Bleep", that whole "Molecules of Emotion" thing, where the water meditated over by a bunch of monks had prettier molecules than the water that people directed ugly sentiments at; no, I don't really buy it either, but I'm also not about to eat from a bowl that reads "Shit: It's What's for Dinner".

And don't get on me about not supporting "free speech". I'll drink me a double tall, extra-dry cup of the free speech right now. But free speech has nothing to do w/ some perceived "right" to proselytizing on the side of a coffee cup, or a constitutional guarantee to your own radio show, for that matter. Yes, as a matter of fact, if I don't like it, I will change the station, thank you very much. And if your advertisers are dropping like flies because of it, that's not some vast, left wing conspiracy; it's old school "let the market decide" style libertarianism - and sometimes, I can hang with that. Get a blog, crybaby.

As far as I'm concerned, there are only two kinds of people in the world; ones who want to cram their beliefs / religions / multilevel marketing opportunities down your craw; and folks who, like the Hulk, just want to be left alone. Sadists who are interested in "Reasonable Discourse" are relatively few, most certainly far between, and definitely aren't to be trusted.

Yes, this is a little disjointed, and just barely on topic. That's what happens when I blog from home, at night, with the world outside my door going so crazy as it is lately.

Speaking of the meaning of life, i think it's apropos that we add one more "Way I See It"... no, f*ck that... "The Way It Is" quote. A tribute to one of the late, great ones. Written originally as a comment on how the world greatest, most sincere lovers could none the less hurt one another, I think it applies just as much to all the martyrs and heroes out there so overzealous to share "The Truth" with the rest of the world.


"Please, a little less love, and a little more common decency"

Kurt Vonnegut

Tuesday, April 17, 2007